A placid composure may sometimes conceal a troubled mind in every sense,are you one of them?
Life.It's just a word on its own,but by definition,it's...A blessing.To live and walk on this Earth itself is a blessing.Sure there are people who'd choose dying over living a miserable life,but ending your life does not make it better.It merely eliminates the chances of it getting better.
Oftentimes we do not see the true value of life.We tend to live our lives working our asses off just to earn money to keep the life going.Where does the appreciation for this gift of life disappear to?As kids,of course we don't really see any value in those actions that the adults take in sustaining a life and a household.Sure,it's a way to keep living,but don't they see?It's not living.It's simply not dying.There's a huge difference between these two.We tend to overlook the minor things that may one day haunt us for not even batting an eyelid at them.What of it then?
Treasuring life is not something every single one of us does.Most of us only begin to treasure the finer bits of life when we're dying.When all we're left with are minutes ticking away towards our impending deaths.Why is this so?Why does death - the polar opposite of life - need to be the only thing that makes us begin to value life?It doesn't even have to be our own lives.It could be the lives of a loved one,an important figure or even a pitiful beggar we see on the sidewalk.Why do we only love life when this 'life' itself is hanging by a thread?
As I've said before.The obsession with material wealth and an attachment to this world,that's what blinds us from the one true treasure that every living being has.Life.We chase our dreams of fulfilling our desires to be filthy rich and being able to pay for anything,leaving behind the love for life altogether.It's disgusting,truth be told.To be chasing after something you can't guarantee will keep you living.Heck,disgusting can't even begin to cover it.
In the end,it all slips through our fingers.That one time you said "I'll change soon.Just not now.Maybe tomorrow.Or the day after."?Poof.Gone.The chances that time had given you are all gone.All because you didn't appreciate the life that was gifted to you by your elders.Time may be your best pal,but when it's dwindling in the single digits,it's your worst enemy.
Losing a loved one has taught me to value the time I still have with those that still have their lives.Right now,it's all I want.All I ask is that God,if he hears me at all,grant my loved ones a long life.Why take away the life of someone who has always been valuing life?Why take away the life of someone who has never neglected its value?
Life is akin to glass.It can break in many ways.And depending on many factors,it may or may not break.Thus,the fragility of life is something we must come to terms with.Else,if time is not on your side,where will your regrets go?
No one can help you when that time comes.
No one.
-D.A~
Thursday, 13 November 2014
Wednesday, 22 October 2014
Subjective Digressions
A reminder to myself on the fragility of the blessing known as friendship,
Friends.People we place faith in to get things done.People who understand us for what we are and also make an effort to prod us in the right way to see us become better people.Not to forget,people who are there not only on your greatest days,but also in your lowest moments.Well,that's MY definition of 'friends' anyway.What are the main pillars of friendship that keep it going for the limitless trials that the parties may face,you may ask?Well...
Trust.Understanding.Giving in when the time is right,to save the friendship instead of giving priority to our egos.And last but not least,to remind each other of their presence in their lives.To remind them that they are not alone in facing their hardships.At whatever life has in store for them.
Some of you might wonder,"How do you know or even notice these things?"
Well if people actually shut their mouths and make an effort to notice the little things other people do for them,they'd know.We humans tend to notice that one mistake someone makes among the thousands of good deeds they've done for their friends.You see,that's what makes us humans insecure about the people around us.We don't look at things from a larger scope.Hate on me if you want,but I believe a horrifyingly large amount of people in this world have narrow minds.They don't try to look at things from a different perspective,or a larger scope,for that matter.And what happens when this lack of understanding occurs?
Trust begins to dangle by a thread.Ready to snap at any moment.
That friendship you've built up?Left in shambles.All because you didn't understand that one friend that needed you the most.Scarred,you begin blaming your past,or more specifically,the people in it,for the state you found yourself in.No,that's not it.Being selfish,that's what it's called.When you begin blaming the people around you,ask yourself this: Aren't you actually crying out for attention and understanding from the people around you?Why hunger for the very same thing you couldn't give the people you lost not too long ago?What are you expecting when you cry out looking for someone to sate your lust for attention and understanding when you were too selfish to give it yourself?Have some food for thought.
Falling out with our friends is part of the 'friendship' process.Arguing just simply births a chance to strengthen the bonds even stronger than before.
I've fallen out with many different people.Some I wish I could talk to again.Some,never at all.
And you...Snow.I understand why you had to do it.Don't hate yourself for it.Don't feel as if you owe us a favour for doing so.I know the phase you're going through.Be strong.We're no longer talking,but always remember,I've always understood you.I will,for the years to come.I know you're stronger than this.Don't falter.
-D.A~
Friends.People we place faith in to get things done.People who understand us for what we are and also make an effort to prod us in the right way to see us become better people.Not to forget,people who are there not only on your greatest days,but also in your lowest moments.Well,that's MY definition of 'friends' anyway.What are the main pillars of friendship that keep it going for the limitless trials that the parties may face,you may ask?Well...
Trust.Understanding.Giving in when the time is right,to save the friendship instead of giving priority to our egos.And last but not least,to remind each other of their presence in their lives.To remind them that they are not alone in facing their hardships.At whatever life has in store for them.
Some of you might wonder,"How do you know or even notice these things?"
Well if people actually shut their mouths and make an effort to notice the little things other people do for them,they'd know.We humans tend to notice that one mistake someone makes among the thousands of good deeds they've done for their friends.You see,that's what makes us humans insecure about the people around us.We don't look at things from a larger scope.Hate on me if you want,but I believe a horrifyingly large amount of people in this world have narrow minds.They don't try to look at things from a different perspective,or a larger scope,for that matter.And what happens when this lack of understanding occurs?
Trust begins to dangle by a thread.Ready to snap at any moment.
That friendship you've built up?Left in shambles.All because you didn't understand that one friend that needed you the most.Scarred,you begin blaming your past,or more specifically,the people in it,for the state you found yourself in.No,that's not it.Being selfish,that's what it's called.When you begin blaming the people around you,ask yourself this: Aren't you actually crying out for attention and understanding from the people around you?Why hunger for the very same thing you couldn't give the people you lost not too long ago?What are you expecting when you cry out looking for someone to sate your lust for attention and understanding when you were too selfish to give it yourself?Have some food for thought.
Falling out with our friends is part of the 'friendship' process.Arguing just simply births a chance to strengthen the bonds even stronger than before.
I've fallen out with many different people.Some I wish I could talk to again.Some,never at all.
And you...Snow.I understand why you had to do it.Don't hate yourself for it.Don't feel as if you owe us a favour for doing so.I know the phase you're going through.Be strong.We're no longer talking,but always remember,I've always understood you.I will,for the years to come.I know you're stronger than this.Don't falter.
-D.A~
Friday, 17 October 2014
Interiorem Pacem
To those who may no longer be talking to me but yet is willing to stay here in my thoughts,
In this world,ironically,darkness in the sense of evil and the essence of corruption,promises wealth,misguided happiness and a mirage of security.Society,governed by false notions,are led to believe that power is success and money is prosperity,except its own dark realities.
I digress,not by any means of contradiction,but as questions of pure intelligence.Should we accept the reality that we created for ourselves?That everything wrong with this world may actually be right?How can we truly know and understand what's right and what's wrong?And is the pursuit of a brighter future pointless?
No.I say what I believe and act as such.Such is free will.Such is the will of everyone.Whether bad is good or good is bad,no one can undoubtedly determine.So mankind,as observed,will act upon the illusion of whatever feels right.So shall we.
This is the one true answer to uncertainty.Feelings.What we feel tells our minds what to think,do or say next.Although feelings are always unstable,feelings control the mind.As the mind is also unstable,that's being human.The very thing that makes us human.
Unstable beings.
I say these things not to pompously rant,but to give a personal and philosophical understanding to the vital importance of fighting for a better reality.Although seemingly useless in an abroad perspective,peace can be achieved.We must fight forever,for however long this means for mankind,because humanity deserves it.Because it feels like the right thing to do.We will fail time and time again but we do not have to stand alone.Illuminate the darkness,with so many other people that you have forged bonds with over the course of your lives.
The pursuit of peace will ultimately create happiness for mankind.Unselfish wisdom.And above all,love in its purest form,destroys hate,slowly but surely.
"What are the humans' greatest strengths?"
Weakness and Vulnerability.
Weakness is potential,and potential requires that we work hard.The world is weak,but it has unequivocal potential.Together we can change the pace of society.But we must all work hard for it.In doing so,the vulnerable traits of man reciprocate.Open your heart.Free your mind.And strength will be ultimately inevitable.Period.
Never underestimate the power of one man.
The power to influence.
The power to inspire.
...And the power to destroy.
-D.A~
In this world,ironically,darkness in the sense of evil and the essence of corruption,promises wealth,misguided happiness and a mirage of security.Society,governed by false notions,are led to believe that power is success and money is prosperity,except its own dark realities.
I digress,not by any means of contradiction,but as questions of pure intelligence.Should we accept the reality that we created for ourselves?That everything wrong with this world may actually be right?How can we truly know and understand what's right and what's wrong?And is the pursuit of a brighter future pointless?
No.I say what I believe and act as such.Such is free will.Such is the will of everyone.Whether bad is good or good is bad,no one can undoubtedly determine.So mankind,as observed,will act upon the illusion of whatever feels right.So shall we.
This is the one true answer to uncertainty.Feelings.What we feel tells our minds what to think,do or say next.Although feelings are always unstable,feelings control the mind.As the mind is also unstable,that's being human.The very thing that makes us human.
Unstable beings.
I say these things not to pompously rant,but to give a personal and philosophical understanding to the vital importance of fighting for a better reality.Although seemingly useless in an abroad perspective,peace can be achieved.We must fight forever,for however long this means for mankind,because humanity deserves it.Because it feels like the right thing to do.We will fail time and time again but we do not have to stand alone.Illuminate the darkness,with so many other people that you have forged bonds with over the course of your lives.
The pursuit of peace will ultimately create happiness for mankind.Unselfish wisdom.And above all,love in its purest form,destroys hate,slowly but surely.
"What are the humans' greatest strengths?"
Weakness and Vulnerability.
Weakness is potential,and potential requires that we work hard.The world is weak,but it has unequivocal potential.Together we can change the pace of society.But we must all work hard for it.In doing so,the vulnerable traits of man reciprocate.Open your heart.Free your mind.And strength will be ultimately inevitable.Period.
Never underestimate the power of one man.
The power to influence.
The power to inspire.
...And the power to destroy.
-D.A~
Friday, 10 October 2014
Maledicti Zelo
To those who still find some form of peace or solace in reading my transcripted thoughts,
Don't we all envy that one person who has all the things we don't?Things such as attention,privileges and even wealth.We become envious of those that have their wants and needs granted to them upon request.Which brings us to another Cardinal Sin...Envy.
Oftentimes we find ourselves in the company of people who don't even need to do anything yet they get all the attention.Some of us become envious,or jealous of these kinds of people and when enough darkness has built up inside us due to that very same envy,we tend to...Go out of our way to be like them.But at what cost?As I've said many times...Let the darkness in enough,and it will consume you.What happens when we try to be like the person right in front of us?
You'll find that your self-appreciation is...Well,kaput.You'll begin hating who you are and start chasing something you were never meant to be.This delusion often brings only one outcome:Failure.Why,you might ask?It's simple.We simply were born with our own respective edges over other people.Be who you truly are and never try to be someone you're not.Trying so would be simply...Undignifying.You're not respecting the greatness you were meant to be.
Envy also puts us in a situation where people have an obligation to put us down for not appreciating what we already have and instead chasing after the impossibilities.If people found out you were envious of someone else,what's to happen?People will know of your insecurities.And again,I emphasise on the word Trust.Know who to trust and tell your secrets to.Just imagine the effect it'd have on your reputation if you told someone untrustworthy and they decided to spill the beans.
We live in a society where people are hell-bent on outdoing others.But for every superior person,there's bound to be a counterpart.There will definitely be envy deep in the darkened hearts of the society.What then?
Two words.Be yourself.Appreciate the existence granted to you in this world.Once you come to terms with that and accept the reality of your disadvantages,you'll learn that it'll be easier to move along in life.Letting go of such envy will be easy when you face your own setbacks.
So how will you look at people now,after realising what your true worth is,human?
-D.A~
Don't we all envy that one person who has all the things we don't?Things such as attention,privileges and even wealth.We become envious of those that have their wants and needs granted to them upon request.Which brings us to another Cardinal Sin...Envy.
Oftentimes we find ourselves in the company of people who don't even need to do anything yet they get all the attention.Some of us become envious,or jealous of these kinds of people and when enough darkness has built up inside us due to that very same envy,we tend to...Go out of our way to be like them.But at what cost?As I've said many times...Let the darkness in enough,and it will consume you.What happens when we try to be like the person right in front of us?
You'll find that your self-appreciation is...Well,kaput.You'll begin hating who you are and start chasing something you were never meant to be.This delusion often brings only one outcome:Failure.Why,you might ask?It's simple.We simply were born with our own respective edges over other people.Be who you truly are and never try to be someone you're not.Trying so would be simply...Undignifying.You're not respecting the greatness you were meant to be.
Envy also puts us in a situation where people have an obligation to put us down for not appreciating what we already have and instead chasing after the impossibilities.If people found out you were envious of someone else,what's to happen?People will know of your insecurities.And again,I emphasise on the word Trust.Know who to trust and tell your secrets to.Just imagine the effect it'd have on your reputation if you told someone untrustworthy and they decided to spill the beans.
We live in a society where people are hell-bent on outdoing others.But for every superior person,there's bound to be a counterpart.There will definitely be envy deep in the darkened hearts of the society.What then?
Two words.Be yourself.Appreciate the existence granted to you in this world.Once you come to terms with that and accept the reality of your disadvantages,you'll learn that it'll be easier to move along in life.Letting go of such envy will be easy when you face your own setbacks.
So how will you look at people now,after realising what your true worth is,human?
-D.A~
Monday, 6 October 2014
Maledictus Superbia
To those still intent on getting into my head and thoughts,
Pride.Harmless in moderation,but what comes of those who harbor too much of it?Arrogance?Solipsism?Don't we all know that one person who's smug,all-talk and condescending towards people who are of lower intelligence?We can't judge or think lowly of them just because they sin differently from us.Each person has their story.
Growing up,some of us never got to bask in the light of glory.Some of us are just mere doormats,being outdone by other people,far more superior to us.But sometimes just because someone does worse compared to you,it doesn't mean they're...Inferior.What if they're shrewd?You'll never know unless you get to know them truly.They'll just remain silent while the ones with big-talk continue preening themselves.
You see,when you begin losing patience for these kinds of people,you begin developing this...Countermeasure.A way to stand up for yourself while putting across the message that you yourself are superior to the others.Hence,the term "Solipsism".Put simply,it's selfishness shown openly to everyone.Take this situation for example: A boy growing up getting criticised for not exhibiting an intelligent aura.He keeps getting called 'stupid' and even his own family members look down on him.Without any parents to guide him,he's on his own.And then he decides to abuse that intellect to begin putting people down.What he felt when he was younger,he exerts on other people.Even to the point where he begins condemning his family members for possessing such an inferior mind,compared to his.
And then one day,that streak of belittling people stops dead in its tracks,and by what?The fact that it chases people away.This 'Countermeasure' the boy thought he had?It began to haunt him.He was losing his friends.He could not seek help from people,for the very same reason why people were avoiding him.This pride of his,he thought it was only to chase away people who looked down on him.He didn't know it was about to ruin his life by chasing everyone away.He's alone now.
That boy...Is none other than myself.I am...In love with my own pride.I grew up with it,and now it's grown into me.Thing is,I'm surprised some people still want to stay,given how...Ill-mannered I can get sometimes when my pride decides to rear its ugly head.Each time someone says something illogical,I just slip into this state where...I lose control of my words.I begin this 'condescending' talk and start talking down to them.It's arrogant,I know.But...I guess if I want to blame it on the people who made it this way,it'd be selfish,right?So I've begun to embrace my biggest flaw.And now it's more of an obsession rather than a flaw.
So to those of you who know me...You now know my biggest flaw.Your impression of me may change...But I won't have remorse.I decided that I do not want to hide this downside of mine,and instead show it.To the people who accept me,I give you my thanks.To those who don't...Well,feel free to leave.There isn't gonna be a red carpet for you out of my life,but you're free to go.
Sometimes dark thoughts are...A blessing.You begin to see life from another perspective.And then you begin to change your approach to life.In the end,the outcome of such changes fall to you and your own actions.How will you live your life,fool?
-D.A~
Pride.Harmless in moderation,but what comes of those who harbor too much of it?Arrogance?Solipsism?Don't we all know that one person who's smug,all-talk and condescending towards people who are of lower intelligence?We can't judge or think lowly of them just because they sin differently from us.Each person has their story.
Growing up,some of us never got to bask in the light of glory.Some of us are just mere doormats,being outdone by other people,far more superior to us.But sometimes just because someone does worse compared to you,it doesn't mean they're...Inferior.What if they're shrewd?You'll never know unless you get to know them truly.They'll just remain silent while the ones with big-talk continue preening themselves.
You see,when you begin losing patience for these kinds of people,you begin developing this...Countermeasure.A way to stand up for yourself while putting across the message that you yourself are superior to the others.Hence,the term "Solipsism".Put simply,it's selfishness shown openly to everyone.Take this situation for example: A boy growing up getting criticised for not exhibiting an intelligent aura.He keeps getting called 'stupid' and even his own family members look down on him.Without any parents to guide him,he's on his own.And then he decides to abuse that intellect to begin putting people down.What he felt when he was younger,he exerts on other people.Even to the point where he begins condemning his family members for possessing such an inferior mind,compared to his.
And then one day,that streak of belittling people stops dead in its tracks,and by what?The fact that it chases people away.This 'Countermeasure' the boy thought he had?It began to haunt him.He was losing his friends.He could not seek help from people,for the very same reason why people were avoiding him.This pride of his,he thought it was only to chase away people who looked down on him.He didn't know it was about to ruin his life by chasing everyone away.He's alone now.
That boy...Is none other than myself.I am...In love with my own pride.I grew up with it,and now it's grown into me.Thing is,I'm surprised some people still want to stay,given how...Ill-mannered I can get sometimes when my pride decides to rear its ugly head.Each time someone says something illogical,I just slip into this state where...I lose control of my words.I begin this 'condescending' talk and start talking down to them.It's arrogant,I know.But...I guess if I want to blame it on the people who made it this way,it'd be selfish,right?So I've begun to embrace my biggest flaw.And now it's more of an obsession rather than a flaw.
So to those of you who know me...You now know my biggest flaw.Your impression of me may change...But I won't have remorse.I decided that I do not want to hide this downside of mine,and instead show it.To the people who accept me,I give you my thanks.To those who don't...Well,feel free to leave.There isn't gonna be a red carpet for you out of my life,but you're free to go.
Sometimes dark thoughts are...A blessing.You begin to see life from another perspective.And then you begin to change your approach to life.In the end,the outcome of such changes fall to you and your own actions.How will you live your life,fool?
-D.A~
Friday, 3 October 2014
Initium Novum
To the people who care enough to read,
Today I begin this blog,which will soon be full of my thoughts and all else I can never say in real life.Let it be known that I am a teenager,as most of you are,and that if my words offend any of you,have my apologies.I am merely speaking my thoughts.I have no one left in life to open up to.No one else will understand the predicament I am facing now.Put simply,I am on my own.
Trust.A big word,yes?The act of placing faith in another person's actions.Leaving it to them to do the things that could bring yourself happiness.Something as simple as leaving something with someone while you go about your duties and commitments,that's already a form of trust.But can we truly place our faith in everyone that comes off as nice to us?Are words now merely a means for people to abuse and make others let down their guard,leaving them vulnerable to the most hurtful actions of others?What has truly happened to the meaning of the word "Trust"?
You see,when you've grown up being bullied,being made a laughing stock of,being stabbed in the back,you begin to put up a wall around your heart.You begin to doubt the people around you.Trust becomes more of a way for the hurt to finally open up to other people.But some people...They abuse that trust.They spill your secrets out.They rip your heart out and tear it to shreds,as if the kindness they exhibited not too long ago was simply...Never there.Who do you place your trust in then?Who else is there for you to talk to when your own family members don't understand you?Teenagers aren't exactly the easiest of humans to decipher.What is the solution when all else fails?
Placing faith in yourself.Only yourself.When you learn to do this,detaching from reality will be like taking candy from a baby.It's simple really.For those of you who know me personally,I have this seemingly boundless hatred for the people around me.Add that on to the fact that I have a pride so big it's even unhealthy for my age,and what do you get?A teenager that takes it in his stride to prove people wrong and even shoot them down when their opinions are inferior compared to his or even those that are worthy enough of clashing with his.Yes,Pride.A sin,yes?A Cardinal Sin.But it's all I have that stands as a protection against Janus-faced people.It also keeps me in the competitive side of everything.It's grown into me so much,that I am aware of my own obsession with my pride.Almost akin to an infatuation with a damsel.A damsel that gives me the drive to move forward and never think twice about making decisions that I believe would benefit me in the long run.
I will end my train of thoughts here,before the words come out any more darker than I intend to.I can never let my dark thoughts take over,for they will only cause someone else harm.Without further ado,I take my leave.
-D.A~
Today I begin this blog,which will soon be full of my thoughts and all else I can never say in real life.Let it be known that I am a teenager,as most of you are,and that if my words offend any of you,have my apologies.I am merely speaking my thoughts.I have no one left in life to open up to.No one else will understand the predicament I am facing now.Put simply,I am on my own.
Trust.A big word,yes?The act of placing faith in another person's actions.Leaving it to them to do the things that could bring yourself happiness.Something as simple as leaving something with someone while you go about your duties and commitments,that's already a form of trust.But can we truly place our faith in everyone that comes off as nice to us?Are words now merely a means for people to abuse and make others let down their guard,leaving them vulnerable to the most hurtful actions of others?What has truly happened to the meaning of the word "Trust"?
You see,when you've grown up being bullied,being made a laughing stock of,being stabbed in the back,you begin to put up a wall around your heart.You begin to doubt the people around you.Trust becomes more of a way for the hurt to finally open up to other people.But some people...They abuse that trust.They spill your secrets out.They rip your heart out and tear it to shreds,as if the kindness they exhibited not too long ago was simply...Never there.Who do you place your trust in then?Who else is there for you to talk to when your own family members don't understand you?Teenagers aren't exactly the easiest of humans to decipher.What is the solution when all else fails?
Placing faith in yourself.Only yourself.When you learn to do this,detaching from reality will be like taking candy from a baby.It's simple really.For those of you who know me personally,I have this seemingly boundless hatred for the people around me.Add that on to the fact that I have a pride so big it's even unhealthy for my age,and what do you get?A teenager that takes it in his stride to prove people wrong and even shoot them down when their opinions are inferior compared to his or even those that are worthy enough of clashing with his.Yes,Pride.A sin,yes?A Cardinal Sin.But it's all I have that stands as a protection against Janus-faced people.It also keeps me in the competitive side of everything.It's grown into me so much,that I am aware of my own obsession with my pride.Almost akin to an infatuation with a damsel.A damsel that gives me the drive to move forward and never think twice about making decisions that I believe would benefit me in the long run.
I will end my train of thoughts here,before the words come out any more darker than I intend to.I can never let my dark thoughts take over,for they will only cause someone else harm.Without further ado,I take my leave.
-D.A~
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